When we’re lost, we need a source of wisdom to guide us home
We’ve all experienced the feeling of being lost; perhaps losing your mum or dad’s hand in a busy store when you were a child; perhaps losing your way in an unfamiliar city; perhaps a more general sense of being lost in your own life, with no clear sense of direction. Being lost can be truly terrifying—we cast around for known signs, trusted faces, something to anchor us—a sense of stability, a way back to recognisable ground. Even as adults, losing track of what we want—or where we’re headed—can be profoundly disorienting.
Neuroscience has shown that the same regions of the brain that handle navigating in the real world—like the hippocampus—also play a role in how we chart life decisions, construct our personal life stories and shift direction. When we get stuck, we start feeling lost in a place that no longer feels familiar—and it’s not just a metaphor, it’s part of our most ancient neurological structures too. I picture it like being lost in a forest; whichever way we turn, all we can see is trees—and then our anxiety increases, reducing our ability to think clearly and to make rational decisions. What we need in that moment is a source of wisdom—a trusted someone to call on for guidance. And that applies whether the forest is a real world wilderness or a metaphorical one. This is not just about advice—it’s about gathering your inner council, a circle of wisdom shaped by relationship and memory. This is why I’m describing this as a wise council, not simply as wise counsel or advice.
Wise council—who are your sources of wisdom?
May I invite you to try a little thought experiment? Picture yourself trying to make a decision about something—perhaps something you’re struggling with at the moment or have done in the past. Bring to mind your thoughts and feelings about the situation; is there confusion, uncertainty, anxiety or fear? Perhaps there’s resignation or a sense of defeat or hopelessness. Whatever those thoughts and feelings are, just sit with them for a moment without trying to push them away or analyse them. Consider them simply as pieces of information which will, in time, help you find your way.
Before turning your imagination outwards—pause and take a breath, notice your feet planted on the floor and your hands resting in your lap, perhaps even the texture of the air around you, or the quiet hum of your environment. And now picture, seated in a semicircle in front of you, a council of trusted advisers. Maybe your closest friends are there, a grandparent, or a favourite teacher from school, or a therapist, your GP, or even someone you’ve never met but greatly admire. Imagine yourself quietly greeting them by name and welcoming them to your wise council. What wisdom do each of them bring? How have they helped you in the past? What skills and life experiences do they have that you could call upon in this situation? Picture yourself describing your situation to each of them, and imagine how they might respond, each in their own way—who speaks first, what do they say? Whose words are you drawn to the most? What message or guidance do you take away from your council? And as we bring our thought experiment to a close, picture yourself offering thanks to each of them in turn, knowing that you can return to them whenever you need them in the future.
Being lost, though uncomfortable in the moment, is part of being human—and sometimes, it’s the only way new vistas come into view; when our path disappears and everything feels murky, our instinct is often to move, to fix, to find. But sometimes, the wisest thing is to stay still. Like a muddy pool that clears when undisturbed—or a lost traveller who waits to be found—clarity comes not from striving, but from trusting that wisdom will arrive when we stop running. Let your wise council come to you—quietly, steadily—and show you the way home.
Next steps
If you’re feeling lost and looking for support in finding your way, I’d be glad to hear from you—please feel free to get in touch to arrange an appointment.
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